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April 3, 2018

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WHO AM I ?

Hello! My name is Carrie Usmar. I married a Brit. We have three children. We moved from the suburbs to the country. I am not a country girl but God has a way of teaching me about the country life. 

 

 I have depression, it never goes away and still hits me hard sometimes. I like to write about it, share my stories and hopefully help people to know they are not alone.

 

I've always been a freak. But I buried that part of me for a long time. Thankfully I learned I love Carrie Usmar, freakness and all.

 

I love to dance and lip sync and share my ridiculous videos in my instagram stories. 

 

I am imperfect, broken, and proud, and I'm taking it one day at a time. Thank you for being here with me.   

April 3, 2018

 When my son turned four I decided to write him a letter. As I wrote it I realized so many of the hard moments I struggle with have made me stronger. The whole essay is published on Kindred Mom. 

I love you.

Even when you test boundaries. Even when you tell me no or refuse to do what I ask. Even when...

April 3, 2018

I looked down at my tea cup and it said Best Wife Ever. And I thought to myself wait a minute, your mind has gone in a spiral. You went from yelling at the kids, which happens sometimes to throwing yourself under a bus. Beating yourself up. Saying things to yourself you would never say to anyone out...

January 23, 2018

Motherhood can be difficult. My daughter has an adventurous spirit and loves to climb. She fell at the playground and couldn't jump like the older kids could. I share how I cultivate resilience in her and teach her that it's okay to fall.

December 25, 2017

But if I focus on all that we didn’t do this year, I am missing what we have done. I am missing those moments of joy that are happening right before my eyes. I am missing time being present with the family. I forget about the other traditions we have, the ones that aren’t on this list. I end up want...

December 8, 2017

There are times I’ve felt ashamed, afraid I am not doing enough. Not caring for you well enough. Afraid I will forget you. And I feel guilty, I don’t get to pay attention to you. I don’t remember everything you like. I didn’t get to make you your own food. I can’t make a list of exactly how you like...

September 1, 2017

I love you more than you know. You are my firstborn, my first everything. My first to bring home from the hospital, my first to plan play dates for, my first to take to the playground and have those awkward conversations with other moms that I will probably never see again, my first to watch graduat...

August 21, 2017

My experience reminded me not to assume anything about a person by looking at their photos. There is always more to their story.

July 10, 2017

We had a lot to prepare before hosting a party. My mind kept jumping from one thing to the next, leaving me agitated. I worked so hard weeding flowerbeds I hadn’t gotten to in years and I wanted to put some mulch down. Life with kids is crazy, its hard to finish what you start, but I was determined...

June 7, 2017

Most importantly, I love you. More than you will ever comprehend. I love every part of you and I always will. I want to keep you this age but I know before I know it you will be one and then graduating preschool and beyond. Time does go fast. But I’m so grateful you are here to share your light with...

May 9, 2016

A few things I have learned, as a mama daring greatly.

(My daughter Celia and I, Photo Credit: Tiffany Axtmann Photography)

 

Don’t fear change. Go with it.

 

Don’t fear trying new things, embrace them.


Wear what YOU want and feel most comfortable in.


Don’t talk about your body negatively, especially not...

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